Arisen's Journal
by Darthnachoz
Summary: Pretty cracky, some third wall breakage, attempting to avoid contradicting canon lore. Basically, the arisen's journal, giving his impressions on the events that occur, from the perspective of someone a bit insane. Rated for language and some references to sexual themes.


By the maker's holy balls, what the hell happened today? One moment things are boring, so much so that I actually contemplated conversing with Valmiro, and the next there's a goddamn dragon attacking Cassardis.

A DRAGON! You know, those things that are so rare they are considered a myth by most common folk, show up once a century or so to wreak havoc and then are either killed or piss off to parts unknown? Yeah. Of course it attacks Cassardis and my dumbass self can't help but play hero. What do I get for my trouble? I get my heart ripped out of my chest and eaten by the maker-be-damned dragon.

Actually, now that I stop to consider it, how the crap does that work anyway? I may not be a healer, but even I know you need a heart to live. But apparently I and the rest of the human race are wrong. Fking dragons and their apparent diplomatic immunity from reality!

Back on track, My heart was apparently stolen, yet I'm still alive for some reason. Right now, I'm laid up in Adaro's hut with the rest of the wounded. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I'm still alive, but I still have no clue what's going on and it pisses me off. Quina's ordered that I'm to stay in a resting position until tomorrow. Had to fight with her just to get her to go get this damn journal. The old bastard Adaro thinks it's funny that Quina has such a hold on me, but He hasn't seen what she does to those who manage to piss her off, either. I'm going to sleep, I can't really do much else tonight anyway. Stupid fking thieving dragons!

So I'm out from under Quina's 'care' now. Today has been hectic as all hell, between the dragon's decision to tell me he wants me to kill him, getting hit on by an absolute whore of a girl called Madeleine, who wanted me to 'escort' her to the encampment on the road between Cassardis and Gran Soren. Was tempted to leave the creature in the middle of nowhere considering she kept stopping ot examine random rocks and 'investigate' random noises in the woods. Stupid girl kept running right into goblin ambushes. At least I had that pawn, (more on them later, I want to finish describing today's events before opening that box of goodies) Rook, I think his name was, with me. If it had been just me Madeleine WOULD have been left behind. My morals wrote her possible death off as a service to the population after the first ambush, but Rook insisted that we help her. Only traveled with her because I was heading toward the encampment myself. I got a fair bit of combat practice out of it, but still would have preferred to not have to do any fighting. I guess that's a hopeless dream though. I do have to find a way to somehow kill the dragon.

We ran into some other guy that got jumped by goblins. Saved the guy and he gave me a cape. Aside from that, nothing happened until we reached the encampment.

Not five steps into the place and a disembodied voice is telling me to find it. Turns out to be some 'chosen one' type of crap, because the dragon decided to take my heart. Whatever, at this point, I just am having a hard time caring, it's almost like I'm numb to the whole 'but thou must' crap. Met some chick in some strange armor on the way out the tent. The armor actually has 'boob' plates. WTF. Anyway, apparently she's foreign, and was placed in charge of the duke's idiot brigade soldiers. Seems to be a bit of a tomboy, offered a tent for sleep. I might take her up on that, so long as sleep is the only thing she has in mind. So, after talking with her I decided to take a look around the place, and a bunch of soldiers run out the gate that leads toward Gran Soren. A few minutes later, I leave the same gate wondering what the loud ass noises were. Apparently a cyclops decided to commit suicide by militia. I helped finish it off, which apparently counted as completing a 'test' for the magic stone in the tent. Then I got formally introduced to the pawns. After that I started writing this, and then I'm going to sleep once I cover the pawns, because holy hell I'm tired.

Apparently pawns are minions for the use of the Arisen. I can't really call them 'people' because I was told by the one who was apparently created off of my own needs (no clue how that works, but this pawn looks and acts like my twin for the most part. Except maybe a bit more insane. And overly subservient which is apparently normal. Whatever.) that pawns have no ambitions, hopes, or purpose, beyond that of helping arisen fight the dragon. They don't even know why, just that they do. Sounds like a religion to me. Do as your told, no I won't explain why this is the way things are, just be a good little drone etc. But yeah, they are like a private army that only serves arisen. So, minions. I would say slaves, but I was told to 'go ride a waterfall' when I told twin to go make me a sandwich. Which was followed by calling me a lazy bastard and some unintelligible grumbling.

I was told that pawns gain their personality from their arisen, and that seems to be fairly true so far. I just hope tomorrow isn't a clusterfuck.

AN-

I don't even know where this is going, my mind just decided this was a good idea, and when you are in a manic episode, you do what you can to keep yourself from going totally insane. Either way, there is an unexplained lack of fanfic for Dragon's Dogma, so I decided to contribute, even if it's only more crap on the pile.

Any views expressed in the text of the story are not necessarily mine, although any expressed in author's notes certainly are.

-AN


End file.
